Gussied Up

My phone’s checkin’ itself out in the mirror. Tryin’ to put a little makeup on to cover up the wear and tear. Oh when will Apple release a new iPhone?!?



Hey folks! It’s official! We have a DJ. Once we singed (intentionally corny typo) on the dotted line, he gave us a lot of song-related homework to do. Apparently, every second must be accompanied by a sentimental and significant song. And I shudder at the songs I most connect to us. They will not be appropriate.



Harvey and I hung out at home, while Jo went out and rocked it like it was 1999. According to Prince, the best year for rock-and-roll was 1977. That was a good year for a lot of reasons.


They’re Breeding

There are thousands of these guys around the apartment … at least enough to manage the hair of an army of 80s heavy metal guitarists. I think they’re breeding too. If you leave 2 of the big ones alone for a while, a little guy suddenly appears. Strange.


Late Night

All is silent in the office tonight. Any moment now there’ll be some tumbleweed and maybe a lone cowboy will round the corner, hand on the butt of his six-shooter, or an alien with a head shaped like a squash asking if I know where to find 8 million rolls of toilet paper … or maybe just the cleaning staff.


Toilet Paper by the Ton

Jo goes to Costco and returns with 8 million rolls of toilet paper. I ask her where they’ll go and this is her solution – the guest shower. I have very mixed feelings about Costco.


When Did Pee Become So Exciting?!

For the first time EVER, Harvey left the living room, strolled casually (mosied) to the bathroom and relieved himself on his pee-pad. This was a thrilling development. Jo and I were overjoyed. Pee has never been so exciting.